“Hey there beautiful, why don’t you smile for me”
“Holy shit, look at that ass”
“I know you want to talk to me, come here baby”
“You shouldn’t wear such clothes if you don’t want me to come and talk to you”
*slaps my ass* “I couldn’t help myself, it just had to be done”
There hasn’t been one week that I haven’t left my house and not been Cat called, whistled at or stopped in the street at least once. On average, it happens about 3 to 5 times a week. Now whenever I say this, I feel as though people think I’m being vein. I once told someone that on my way to work, a man literally stopped his car on the pavement and got out and went “You alright sexy, you’re lookin good today!” and proceeded to try and talk to me. He then had the audacity to call me a “Bitch” when I ignored him. This to me, was not okay. But when I described this incident to a guy I know, he laughed and went “But if you didn’t get the attention you would miss it.” And TRUST ME when I say this, I would not miss the sexual harassment I receive every time I leave the house.For a long time, I thought that it was my fault that it was happening. That I should expect this sort of thing as a woman and I started to think that if I wanted it to stop, I shouldn’t wear skinny jeans… or yoga pants, or shorts or skirts or leggings or v neck tops or vests… and the list just went on and on. And thats when I realised that I should be able to wear whatever the
fuck I want and be comfortable to walk down the street with no fear of harassment. Because it’s not me who needs to change, it’s the people who think its okay to shout at women in the street that do.
When I was about fourteen, I had my first experience of cat calling and I will never forget it. It wasn’t flattering or sweet or funny, it was scary and uncomfortable for me. I was on my own on my way home from school at about 4:30pm in January so it was getting dark. (My school didn’t have a school uniform at the time so I was wearing normal clothes.) And as I waited at the bus stop a man approached me. The way he looked at me, it was like he was picturing me in any way he liked. And I could feel that. I could feel that he was looking at me in a sexual way, he then said “You look cold, come sit on my lap.” I didn’t know how to react to this. I was on my own, there was no one else at the bus stop and this man in his mid twenties was asking me to sit on him. So I walked home that day. I was in shock, I didn’t know how to deal with it. I shouldn’t have to deal with it. Especially as young as fourteen.
To you , it may feel like you’re just complimenting someone but you must put yourself in the receivers shoes. Some things you say are not pleasant or wanted.
I have been called every name in the book by men in the street; “Bitch” , “stupid” , “stuck up”, even “Prude” and these names are called AFTER I ignore them, like I’m the bad guy in the situation. That because I’m not reacting to his cat calling, I am therefor a “stuck up bitch”. And this needs to stop. Men need to understand that when you’re whistling at a woman or shouting out of your car or honking your horn as you drive by,
you are harassing someone.
This post was inspired by a video that I think everyone should watch. It really gives you a opportunity to get the point of view of a woman being cat called multiple times in a day. Please click on the link below, and thank you for reading. 🙂